Yesterday, on December 15, 2016 we said our tearful and heartbreaking goodbyes to Mocha. Although it was time to go, it still leaves us with an enormous hole in our family… he, and Kit, truly are family to us. Their presence, woven deeply into our everyday lives. For our kids, they have not known a day where he wasn’t there to give them companionship, to play, to listen, to love, and to love back.
Mocha, had the biggest, most loyal heart. He kept fighting his failing body to be with us as long as he could.
How can I summarize 18 wonderful years in a few words? Back in 1998, we had Penny, who was my cat. Hers’ is another story, but we went to Meow-Aid to see what we could do to help her. Their suggestion was to get a calm, male cat as a companion, so we agreed to bring one on for a trial run. We first met Mocha at a Meow-Aid volunteer’s apartment. She had a white Tom, and there was Mocha lying calmly beside him- black as night. She told us his name, and that he had a brother that was adopted out and living on the Island. She told us he was 8 months old, but by that time he was FULL size and had BIG paws. She clipped his claws for us and we took him home.
Right away you could tell he had a special temperament and this personality about him. Very calm- he’s never scratched or bit anyone, at least on purpose. I remember letting him outside to explore for a bit one night, and I went for a short jog. After a few blocks, I look back to see this black figure bounding behind me! It was then I realized that he had no fear of the outside world and really just wanted to be around you, where ever you are. I moved him in to live with me at my Grandparents.
My Grandma loves cats, but not necessarily the black ones. Of course my Grandpa grumbled when he saw what I brought home, but before long I saw him petty Mocha with his foot, and his personality quickly won Grandma over. When Grandma got really sick, Mocha was always there in the middle of things. He really helped us deal with the situation just by being him. Calm, and always there to listen.
He had this thing with dogs. I don’t think he feared them, and I think as a kitten was exposed to them. When he met Kirby, he would lie down on the coffee table, and watch Kirby do circles around the coffee table. When Kirby got within range, WHACK! Out comes this paw to smack the top of his head! No claws, no malice, just letting him know who the boss is. Kirby had such thick fur on his head anyways, but it was great sport for the cat. Another time Mac, Uncle Henry’s dog came by for a visit. He was a BIG boxer mix and strong. He happily ran into the living room, and a black blur flies out from under the coffee table and attached itself to Mac’s butt. Mac yelped in fear, and ran around the table 2 or 3 times before the black blur detached. From that point, Mac would stay at the front door and not even think about coming into the living room. Mocha had this thing about squirrels. One summer day, a squirrel was running between our and the neighbor’s house. Mocha was on the ground looking at him with delight! Squirrel bounded over to the wire to the neighbors house, Mocha would be his shadow. Back and forth the Squirrel tried to get on with his business, but Mocha was on the ground, watching, following. Sure enough, after 10 minutes of being chased, the Squirrel let out this annoyed squirrel “chitter” but from then on, squirrels were referred to as “Mocha’s friend”
We moved Mocha with us to Madison, where he adjusted from living in a house to a townhouse. No yard to explore, but a couple of decks including the rooftop deck. We thought he would like a buddy, so we brought Kit home, and after a cautious 24 hours, the two became buddies and then a bonded pair. Again, we could not ask for more easy going personalities, but it became clear that Mocha was the leader and the one that would initiate play that usually left black and orange fur all over the carpet. Being roughly the same age, they were the best of friends. Once, Mocha was stalking a bug… patiently, slowly. Kit didn’t have the same patience, so he barged in and the bug got away. Mocha turned toward Kit and gave a swat and hiss to say “you ruined the hunt!”
Mocha’s sense of loyalty was unusual for a cat. We went on a week long vacation, and sure enough, he escaped from the townhouse to go look for us… maybe he was annoyed at not having outside time, but he was missing for a number of days. When I got back, I went around looking for him. I was pretty concerned as it was warm out, and he had not eaten or drank anything for a number of days. As I walked down the alley, I called out, and after a few minutes, I heard this very cautious “meow” from a bush. Sure enough, he had hunkered down and stayed hidden. When I picked him up, he was much lighter, but after we brought him inside, he was back to his old self and I was relieved to find him.
When we brought Erica home and placed her carseat down on the floor, sure enough it was Mocha who first approached. Cautiously, slowly he made his way closer to inspect the package. We have a photo of him gently sniffing her face and introducing himself. Kit followed Mocha’s lead and introduced himself. The cats spent many hours snoozing on the deck or bed at Madison. They enjoyed looking out the window and exploring the rooftop deck and other units it seems.
When we moved to Masset, again they were quick to adapt and I think they really enjoyed having a yard again. By now, we were spending less time with them and more on the kids/house, but they knew when the kids were down and when to come out. We got all sorts of wildlife cruising through our backyard, and a few times, I saw Mocha stand off, and win, against some much larger Raccoons! A few times I thought I had to bring a stick and save him, but he seemed to hold his own.
By now, they were starting to slow down a bit and become Senior cats. They still enjoyed the extra space and their spot on the couch. You know those big black house spiders? They didn’t stand a chance around Mocha. We’d find munched up legs on the floor all the time. He would play the game of “I’m not looking” to give prey a chance to get away, and the moment they make a break for it, BAM! He also had an unusual habit of dragging things around. Once at Madison, he grabbed the string of a helium balloon and pulled it around the house. Often you’d find a sock missing or he’d get it and proudly announce that he’s bringing it to you. As for food, he was an oddball again. Corn on the cob, chicken, watermelon, beef seemed to be staples… but for whatever reason, dried cuttlefish was his favorite! Normally he’d meow and wait, but for cuttlefish he would bit your fingers off before you got the bag opened!
When we moved to the Lundies, going from a house to a 1 bedroom suite, again I was amazed that both cats took it in stride. The main thing was they were with us. Shortly after we moved, we had to say goodbye to Kit, and Mocha, true to form, was waiting outside for long periods for his buddy to come home. It was a very sad time. 2 weeks after, he got really sick (pancreatitis) and that is when his weight went from 12 lbs to about 8 lbs. It was a hard time, and we noticed that where before he usually sat beside you, now he was a lap cat.
Finally we moved to Crestlawn, and again, he adapted quickly to having more space and a yard again. By now Mocha was 16, and although slowing down, was still very much like a kitten. Hunting moths in the yard, taking naps on the deck or under a shrub. He enjoyed roaming the yard and neighborhood, and even had a couple of encounters with Raccoons. I also noticed that he interacted with the kids a lot more, I guess he figured that they could also feed/brush him, and we have many pictures of Mocha lying down on the deck with the kids under the warm sun. He spent his time looking out the window at the squirrels/birds. In the cold weather he would stretch out in front of the fireplace to warm himself. Last summer we noticed that he was losing more weight and drinking more.
He had turned 18 in August, but was still active- proudly bringing home live moths that he caught in the yard. Usually his face was covered in cobwebs as he prowled through brush and the garage. A few times I found him in a deep sleep under a shady shrub in the summer sun. He had a really good summer.
As fall came around, we noticed that Mocha couldn’t keep down his food, and was losing even more weight. By this time, he was bone, skin, and fur. His appetite was still very good, but we thought it best to bring him in. At first the vet thought it was hyperthyroidism, maybe a tumor, but the blood work came back normal. We then scheduled an ultrasound, and that didn’t turn up a tumor, so all in all good news. We changed his diet to all wet, and for some reason his appetite was ravenous, so we thought he’d be able to maintain or increase his weight if he could keep the food down.
The following week we got a call from the vet, who had a closer look at the ultrasound, and found that his kidneys were failing, and probably at stage 3 or 4. Good news turned to terrible news, so at this point it was all about quality of life and making him comfortable. We changed his diet and added some medication and antibiotics.
He was doing well, eating everything up until last week. At that point, he didn’t want to eat any of his wet food, and he had trouble keeping food down.
It was so hard to watch him at this point, and trying to gauge if he was in discomfort or pain. He was having trouble jumping up on his chair, and even staggered a few times while walking. He was just a skeleton and light as a feather. At times, he would just stare off at the ground, so he definitely was not himself.
All I could think of was how do I make this decision? I could see him making a valiant effort to continue being with us, but I called the vet to give an update. Of course the vet’s job is to do what they can to continue treating, but I explained that quality of life was the most important, and to do what is best for Mocha. As hard as it was, I scheduled an appointment for Friday. No more vomiting, no more extreme thirst or hunger, no more weakness and sickness, no more pills or needles.
Afterwards, I said sorry and promised him I would be with him every step of the way. It was the least I could do for all his years of companionship and being there during all the major milestones in my life- the passing of my Grandparents, being married, moving from E61st to Madison to Masset and finally to Crestlawn, and there for my kids since they were born.
The next day he perked up and was himself again. You can tell just by how he looks at you. I sat on the couch and he slowly climbed up on me and placed his head under my chin. He’s never done that before. That night, he slept in Sam’s room. He’s never done that before.
The next evening, he was again acting normal and content- to the point of thinking if I made a mistake scheduling the appointment. But then something seemed to change, and that night I decided to take a blanket and pillow, and slept on the floor beside him to keep an eye on things. In the middle of the night I awoke and found him in obvious discomfort and weakness. It was the first time that I would say he was really feeling distress, and so I stayed home with him on Thursday.
The next morning, it was apparent that he was going downhill- not eating and drinking sparingly. He let out a few meows that I’ve never heard before- that clearly communicated that he was feeling discomfort. I could not let him go through another 24 hours of this, so I called the vet to see if something could be scheduled later that day, and luckily, they had a spot open at 430
I finished my last meeting at 2pm, and finished work for the day. I checked if he wanted any food or treats, or wanted to use the litter box, but all he wanted was a little drink of water. I sat down on the couch and put him on my lap. He thankfully settled and had a very deep sleep. I sat there thinking… thank you so much for being with us, being the best buddy, hold on just a little longer, and where did the time go. I remember when I first got him, his back was solid muscle, but now his body was weak and frail, however still had that strong heart and will to continue. I watched the sunset and when it was down, it was time to wake him up and go.
He was alert as I put him into the kennel, and I let him have a last look at our home before walking out the door. I picked up the kids and Evonne and went to the vet.
All I can say is that I chose to hold him through the whole process. It was so hard to feel him slip away in my arms, and as much as it was the right thing to do, and it was the right time, it was unbelievably emotional. It wasn’t just a pet or cat we were saying goodbye to, it was a family member that’s been with us through everything. As hard as it was, I kept my promise to be with him to the end… just like he loyally followed us through life… every step of the way.
Thank you Mocha. You and Kit were truly the best cats and we’ll never forget you.
